ADD/ADHD

How Mindfulness Can Improve Your Focus

By Tereasa Jones | Published June 23, 2017

In a fast-paced world with countless distractions and demands on our focus, mindfulness and meditation have gained popularity. The most basic principles of mindfulness are about living consciously and paying close attention to the present moment. Because mindfulness requires a special level of attention, it may seem challenging for a person with ADHD to practice this form of meditation. However, research has shown that mindfulness, when adapted for ADHD, can improve focus and concentration.

#1: Single-Tasking

With the demands of modern living, multitasking has become the norm for many people. Unfortunately, multitasking often does more harm than good, resulting in memory problems, excess stress, and increased distractibility. Practicing mindfulness demands single-tasking and asks practitioners to focus on one task at a time. Slowing down and eliminating multitasking can increase your focus and your productivity.

#2: Stress Reduction

Stress often escalates when people get overwhelmed by present demands and future fears. Mindfulness asks that your attention remain in the present moment. Instead of worrying about the future, mindfulness brings your attention back to the present and allows you to focus on what’s in front of you. Mindfulness will help you redirect your thoughts away from future worries and anxieties so you can focus on the present. In addition, the improved focus you’ll get from single-tasking will help prevent you from getting overwhelmed and stressed by everything coming at you all at once.

#3: Improve Concentration

Other research has shown that mindfulness can help rewire your brain and create new neurological pathways. It has also been shown to increase grey matter in the brain, and that extra density can improve one’s overall psychological well-being. By rewiring your brain and creating new pathways through mindfulness and meditation, you’re helping yourself find new ways to cope with stress and handle tasks. This all means that you’ll be better equipped to deal with distractions, resulting in improved concentration.

At first, mindfulness may seem challenging. In fact, many new practitioners struggle with feeling that mindfulness has made them more distracted. This feeling is normal because mindfulness will initially draw attention to your propensity for distraction. Noticing your distractions is the first step in the process. With time, you’ll learn to recognize them and let them go so you can focus on the task at hand.

I hope you find these tips helpful. Watch for my group on planning that I will be rolling out sometime this summer.

NEED HELP? Set up a complimentary strategy session so we can talk about it HERE.

Also posted in Boomers, Coaching, Cognitive Distortions, Communication, Couples, Decision management, Decision Management, Friends, Life Coaching, Procrastination, Relationships, Relationships, Singles, Time management | Tagged ADHD, concentration, energy management, mindfulness, self-care, stress reduction | Leave a comment

Are You Ready To Take Control of Your Schedule? It’s Easier Than You Think!

By Tereasa Jones | Published June 6, 2017

Few things upset our lives more than a failure to plan. The Executive Functioning area of the brain is the part responsible for planning, so when there are challenges in this area, planning just doesn’t happen. A misfiring Executive Functioning area can hit people differently and affect the way they interact with the world. For example; people with ADHD have a different relationship with time than those without ADHD. I’ve heard my clients say there are only two times: there is “now”, and there is “never”. This means that if someone with ADHD doesn’t do something immediately, it will never get done.

Even though there can be lot of chaos in life for people who fail to plan, there are a few upsides as well. One is thrill of immediate gratification and being flexible enough to do whatever interests them at the time. Many of my clients in the past have avoided planning altogether for fear that they would “put themselves in a box” and then life would just not be pleasant and spontaneous. The ones who have embraced planning, however, have found the opposite to be true. If you plan out your time in advance, you will be more efficient. If you are more efficient, you will have more time to play. True, some of the spontaneity is taken out of your life, but there will also be the relief you feel knowing the essentials of your day are taken care of.

In response to clients’ avoidance of planning, for fear they would be trapped or “in a box”, I developed a bit of a mantra. It goes like this: You can trade time, but you can’t steal it. This means that if you have a time set aside for one thing but you want to do another, you have to look at your schedule and decide what you are going to trade for that time. If I have blocked off time for writing, and I’m not feeling creative at the time, I can’t just blow it off. I have to find another block of time to move it to. Sometimes that block of time will end up being my free time. That really stinks, but I have to make a decision to either take my free time now and write later, or write now so that I can take my free time later. It really is pretty simple. I do, however, have to be honest here. I occasionally steal my time. Yep, I’ll admit to it. You will too. You don’t have to be 100% perfect on this. But if you aren’t at least 90%, your life will start to spin out of control.

After accepting that there is merit in planning ahead, the next step is to decide how to do it. I recommend weekly planning at the same time each week, with daily planning in order to fulfill your weekly commitments. Here are a few tips to get you started:

Decide on your planning tools. There are many out there and people have their own preferences. Personally, I use a digital calendar and a paper planner. Most people don’t differentiate between calendars and planners, but there is a definite difference. I’ll say more about that in a future post.
Know the difference between a “to do” item and a project. A “to do” item is usually simple and can be accomplished without multiple steps. A project will have many steps (or multiple “to do” items) in order to complete it.
Plan at the same time every week, and then adjust your plan every day.
Consider weekly planning on either Sunday or Monday morning to get your week started right.
Daily planning can be done either the night before or in the morning. I prefer the night before so that I don’t waste any time in the mornings. It also helps me get up and around because I already know what I am doing that day.
Block off spaces of time for each of the things you plan to accomplish. Be realistic and remember that people with ADHD tend to see time differently than others. Be sure and add extra time to your estimate to account for this tendency.
Find yourself an accountability partner. This could be a friend or a coach. I wouldn’t normally recommend a family member. Too often when a family member fills this role, it is seen as nagging, whereas with a friend or a coach, it is seen as reminding.
The last step is your daily review. Review at the end of your day how well your plan went. Note what went right and what went wrong. Make adjustments in your style accordingly.

I hope these tips help you. Watch for my group on planning that I will be rolling out sometime this summer. Planning is a skill. Skills take time and practice. If you are 10% better next week than this week, give yourself a huge pat on the back. It’s a process.

NEED HELP? Set up a complimentary strategy session so we can talk about it HERE.

Also posted in Boomers, Coaching, Cognitive Distortions, Communication, Couples, Decision management, Friends, Life Coaching | Tagged ADHD, avoidance, coaching, daily planning, executive functioning, life, paper planner, planning, planning tools, Relationships, spontaneity, weekly planning | Leave a comment

Executive Functioning and Problem Solving

By Tereasa Jones | Published June 2, 2017

There is no such thing as a problem-free life. I wish there was, but there just isn’t! That’s the first truth that we have to accept. When we are faced with a problem, we could always try to avoid it. But avoidance is actually counterproductive. The more we avoid the problem, the bigger it gets. We could try to give it to someone else, but that doesn’t usually work either. Why? Because it isn’t their problem, and the solution they come up with is their own, not ours. We could just make a quick decision and call it done. How many times I have done this, only to regret it later. So… what’s the solution to the problem of having problems?

Before we talk about solutions, let’s talk about why it can be difficult for those with ADHD to process them. The Executive Functioning center of the brain is where problem solving takes place. It is also an area of the brain that people with ADHD have difficulties with. After we acknowledge that the Executive Functioning center of the brain isn’t going to help very much, we can develop strategies to make sure that a person with ADHD doesn’t become so overwhelmed with solving their problems that they just give up trying.

Here are some of the roadblocks that I personally have when dealing with problems. Maybe you will see yourself in some of them:

#1: I haven’t clearly defined the problem. (I need to look under the hood)
#2: It seems like it will take too much time. (I stink at estimating time)
#3: There are too many possibilities or choices. (That overwhelming feeling is waiting in the shadows)
#4: Fear of making the wrong choice. (Consequences!? I’m not sure what they are yet, but I don’t want to have to pay them)

I could make the list longer, but I think you get the gist.

Let’s take a look at Roadblock #1: I haven’t clearly defined the problem.
If we aren’t careful, we could work and work to solve a problem that isn’t really a problem at all. Here is an example: One of my clients wanted to work on getting along better with her boss. She said the lines of communication between them was poor. We worked and worked on this problem, but made no headway. Finally, I asked her if she was sure that this was the right problem to be working on. She initially said that it was, but upon further discussion, it turned out that the real problem was that she didn’t want to work there at all. She really wanted to pursue her dream to become an interior designer. We were able to change course after correctly identifying the “real” problem and have worked out a plan for her to return to school (while still being employed) to get her credentials. Of course there are many more challenges she will need to overcome, but I have faith that she will be able to address them now that she has clearly defined the problem.

On to Roadblock #2: It seems like it will take too much time.
Being realistic about time is another issues that people with ADHD have. After clearly defining the problem, one of my favorite strategies to deal with this roadblock is to “chunk it down”. All this really means is that you list the steps that need to be taken. After listing all of the steps, you may have 5-10 more manageable “to-do” items on your list. Now you can get a grasp on how much time you think each one of the steps will take. Write down that number… and then double it. Yes, I said DOUBLE it. Knowing that correctly estimating times is a challenge, we should give ourselves a cushion. I can almost hear you now saying “But what if I finish before the time is up and have nothing left to do? I will be bored!” First, boredom won’t kill you, and secondly, always have something on hand that you can do should you find yourself with some extra time on your hands.

How about Roadblock #3: Too many choices or possibilities.
The biggest problem with this roadblock is that it often leads to either procrastination or paralysis. Either way, the decision isn’t being made. When you are confronted with a situation where you have many possible choices, it might be difficult to choose among them, even when the stakes are low and most of the choices would turn out fine. So, narrow your focus. Pick 3 or 4 of the possible choices and look at their pros and cons. Eliminate each choice one at a time until you only have one left. That’s the one! That is your choice. See, that isn’t so hard. I know, easy to say when you aren’t the one standing in the cracker aisle trying to make a decision about the right cracker for the occasion. Really, your guests probably won’t even notice!

Finally, there is Roadblock #4: Fear of making the wrong choice.
This is a first cousin of Roadblock #3, too many choices. Ask yourself “What’s the worst thing that could happen if I make the wrong choice?” Usually the worst thing isn’t really all that bad. This is really based on a limiting belief that there is a “right” choice and a “wrong choice”, and you must choose the “right” one. Develop something you can say to yourself (a mantra) when this limiting belief threatens to derail you. An example might be. “There is no “right” or “wrong” choice, any choice I make will work just fine”. Find a mantra that resonates with you and work on it. But keep it short. Our subconscious loves it when we give it too much information. Gives it more to argue about!

Give these suggestions a try and see if they work for you.

If you would like some help with these, please contact me to set up a complimentary strategy session and we will see if working with me might help you!

Also posted in Coaching, Communication, Decision Management, Decision management, Life Coaching, Procrastination, Relationships, Time management | Tagged declutter, life, mental clutter, organization, problem solving, reclaim your freedom, streamline your life, Time management | Leave a comment

Executive Functioning – The Root of the Problem for Those with ADHD

By Tereasa Jones | Published May 24, 2017

Executive functioning is the decision-making center of the brain. It’s the part of our brains that helps us do just about everything that we do, except for autonomic functions. We don’t need to think about breathing, for example, it just pretty much happens. We don’t think about our eyes blinking as they, for the most part, just open and shut rapidly on their own. However, we do need to think about what time we need to get to work on time, or plan family vacations, or finish our homework, or get our expense reports in at work. These are functions and decisions that will have a consequence attached if they don’t get done. Some people call our executive functioning center the “CEO” of the brain. This is a pretty good visual for all of the things that executive functioning is responsible for.

These kinds of decisions are also the ones that are the most difficult for a person with ADHD. Why? Because the ADHD brain lacks the stimuli to get its thoughts organized properly, or to even remember that it has to consciously think about certain things. The CEO isn’t doing their job!

For people with ADHD, planning, problem solving, attention, working memory, verbal reasoning, inhibition, multi-tasking, mental flexibility, initiation, task self-monitoring, emotional regulation, sustaining focus, and sustaining effort are functions that are not working properly. Wow, as I read what I just typed, I thought, “What a bleak picture that paints of people with ADHD.” Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my ADHD clients! Let me tell you that people with ADHD are some of the most creative, fun-loving, sensitive, caring people I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. But the reason they are my clients is because their Executive Functioning Center needs some tweaking!

Over the next few weeks, I’m going to focus on Executive Functioning. Without a good understanding of how it impacts the ADHD brain, it is difficult to understand what’s actually going on and how to develop systems, strategies, and routines to take care of those things that don’t come so easily to people with ADHD.

Some things to remember as you go through this series are:

Not everyone is the same. There is a wide spectrum of differences and abilities in the Executive Functioning of all people, and this is certainly true for people with ADHD as well.
When I work with people with ADHD, the first thing I do is look for their strengths. It is so much easier to use strengths to develop plans rather than solely focusing on challenges.
We all have challenges. All of us! People with ADHD have some challenges that are pretty predictable given their diagnosis, but that doesn’t make them less able to perform.
Through the development of systems, strategies, routines, and self-compassion, people with ADHD can be productive and on top of their lives. It just takes some strategizing.

If you or someone you care about has ADHD, you are not going to want to miss out on this series. First comes understanding, then comes action. Without understanding, it’s hard to know what to do next. That is the reason coaching is an irreplaceable part of the treatment plan for people with ADHD.

Please comment and let me know what you would like to know about Executive Functioning. I’ll be sure and include those thoughts in the series. And if you need a coach, or you think you might benefit from coaching, please contact me to see if working with me might help. You can grab a copy of my new e-book “Living Life Intentionally with ADHD, Open the Door to Your Potential” here. I hope you find it helpful!

Also posted in Coaching, Communication, Decision management, Decision Management | Tagged declutter, life, mental clutter, organization, reclaim your freedom, streamline your life, Time management | Leave a comment

Minimalist or Simplicity, What’s the Difference?

By Tereasa Jones | Published May 18, 2017

Everywhere you turn today, you see books, articles, and blog posts about simplifying your life, or the value of a minimalist lifestyle. Some might say that both phrases have been overused, and perhaps they would be right. But it’s the concepts, not the words, that I’m interested in. What you decide to call these concepts isn’t nearly as important as what you actually do with them.

When you decide to live a clutter-free life, I think it’s important to think about all the “stuff” you have, all the “stuff” you bring in, and all the “stuff” you can get rid of. If you are anything like most of us, you bring in a lot more stuff than you take out. This leads to massive amounts of clutter in your home. Today, many people rent at least one, or sometimes more, storage units, just to house their “stuff”. Their “stuff” has literally grown to the point where it can no longer be contained in their homes. Storage lockers might be great if you have a spare million or two lying around, but pretty expensive for the rest of us. So, what can we do to help get rid of some of our “stuff”?

For now, let’s think about this as living with less, but still having what you need and want. There are a lot of tips on how to clear your closet or organize your drawers, but I don’t think that’s what is needed here. I think what you need is a new way of thinking about your stuff. We are all consumers, that’s for sure. So, how do we stop all of this consumption? Why should we want to stop it? The bigger, perhaps more important question is “What will it mean for my life if I live with less, but still live with the things I love?”

I can share what it means to me as I downsize, declutter, and put the brakes on my consumption. It means I have:

More time with my family.
More space and time for hobbies.
More time to create.
A space that is pleasing to me, especially when I first get home. I can actually enjoy the beauty of my home, without the clutter.
More energy. It takes a lot of energy to tolerate clutter.
Less stress. Fewer choices to make leaves me free to spend more time enjoying things.

I guess you could say it all in four words: freedom, time, space, and energy. These are the things that I am learning I can have, if I just give up bringing more in, and spend more time taking things out!

How about you? What would it mean to you to declutter, simplify, minimize, and limit your consumption?

I’d love to hear about some of the things you do to streamline your life. We learn by sharing with each other, so comment below and let’s start streamlining together. You can grab a copy of my new e-book “Living Life Intentionally with ADHD, Open the Door to Your Potential” here. I hope you find it helpful!

Also posted in Coaching, Decision Management, Decision management, Procrastination | Tagged declutter, life, mental clutter, organization, reclaim your freedom, streamline your life, Time management | Leave a comment

Streamline Your Life with These 10 Clutter Hacks!

By Tereasa Jones | Published May 10, 2017

Last week, we talked about mental clutter and how it can impact your daily life. This week, let’s talk about physical clutter. Learning how to managing physical clutter is a huge subject, but with some systems and structures, you can reclaim a sense of physical order in your life. Once it is under control, you will begin to notice that you are more relaxed and much less stressed when you are in your space. As an added bonus, I have a free clutter hack checklist that you can download at the end of the article to get you started!

To start, here are 10 clutter hacks that will streamline your life:

#1: Find a permanent home for the important things that you use on a daily basis. For instance, you could hang a key hook near your home’s doorway. This is where your keys will live from now on. Never let your keys leave your hand until they are hanging on that key hook. Keep your wallet or purse, phone, planner, umbrella, jacket, or anything else important near the key hook so you will easily be able to grab them on the way out of the door. If you have the space and the budget, a mud bench can work well for this purpose.

#2: Deal with your mail. Before the mail leaves your hand, deal with it. Do an instant sort by standing next to the trash and/or recycle bin and toss your junk mail. Don’t let it take up residence in a pile on your counter, desk, or table. If you find important mail, put it in a designated spot that you will go through once a week and take care of. If it is urgent, deal with it NOW. Not later.

#3: Keep projects and hobbies accessories together in bins or decorative boxes. Here, there are so many options for attractive storage that you can incorporate them into the décor of your home. Be sure to label them clearly to avoid the “out of sight, out of mind” tendency. Make sure that each family member has their own bin, just for their own miscellaneous stuff.

#4: Do a “race against time” when you need to do a quick clean up. Set a timer for 15 minutes and then hurry through the house, picking up as much clutter as you can. Remember that, while this will instantly improve the look of your space, you will still need to sort through the collected clutter at some point. This is a nice trick for when you only get 15 minutes notice before someone shows up at your door. This can actually become a fun game if you involve the whole family!

#5: Set an intention of 15 minutes every day to tidy up the places that are always a mess, such as your desk or a kitchen counter. Do this before you move forward with the rest of your day. It may take a week or more, but if you just stick with it, you will build a habit and it will get cleared. The only caveat here is that you must completely clear one area before moving on to another area. One step at a time.

#6: Live Clean. Set an intention that you will clean up as you go. If you use a bowl, a spoon, and a cup for breakfast, it goes straight into the dishwasher, not on the counter or in the sink. If you pull out 5 different outfit ideas to wear to school or work in the morning, re-hang or re-fold the items and put them away before leaving the area. (If you choose your outfit the night before, this problem could be eliminated altogether).

#7: Keep an empty container (maybe a box or sack) in your closet. When you find something that you don’t love, or doesn’t fit, or for some reason you don’t choose, put it in your container to donate. There are plenty of people who will be delighted to have these items. When the container is full, take it to your donation location of choice.

#8: Don’t buy more than you can use or more than you can store. If your pantry is small and storage space is scarce, buy only what you can comfortably store. If you buy more, the newer items might get piled on top of the older items, which won’t be discovered until well past the expiration date. This wastes money, time, and is unsightly.

#9: Keep travel items together. You may end up with duplicates of some things, but it will be worth it when you pack and arrive at your destination. Going on too many trips to Walmart after arriving at my destination taught me this one. Remember that cosmetics, medications, and some personal care items have expiration dates. These are the things that you should not store, but rather have them a checklist so that you can pack them as you go. Create a packing list. You can start it now, and add to it the next time you travel. I actually have two, one for road trips, and one if I am flying. Believe me when I say that I have a lot of comfort items that I like to take with me and flying doesn’t allow for some of them.

#10: Consider going digital with your reading. When purchasing a new book, see if there is a digital option and get the app to read it on your device. Magazines can be a huge clutter issue. I admit that I still like holding a magazine in my hands, but I am moving towards going digital as each subscription expires. The upside of going digital is that you have all your books, magazines, and reading material in the same place to take with you when you travel!

As always, baby steps. Even one small change today will make a big difference tomorrow.

Also posted in Coaching, Decision Management, Life Coaching, Procrastination, Relationships, Time management | Tagged declutter, life, mental clutter, organization, reclaim your freedom, streamline your life, Time management | Leave a comment

Streamline Your Life: Let’s Talk About Clutter

By Tereasa Jones | Published April 27, 2017

We can’t discuss streamlining our lives without also talking about clutter, it is one of the biggest obstacles in the way of us getting organized. There are two types of clutter that I would like to focus on, the first is the clutter taking up space in our environments (our home, office, car, yard, etc.) This is one we will address next week. Today we will concentrate our attention on mental clutter, because this one can stop us right in our tracks.

Mental clutter is often where physical clutter starts. I’ve had clients tell me they feel so overwhelmed by the disorder in their brains that they just can’t get anything started. A large part of this overwhelm comes from trying to hold onto everything, remember everything without compartmentalizing it first. I want to give you a couple of strategies to remedy this, and get you started on taking charge of your mind.

clutter The first strategy is blocking off time to think. Yep! Just think. It’s something we both do too much of and not enough of all at the same time – especially as humans with ADHD! But we rarely take the time to shape our thoughts in a unified, structured, and constructive way. I recommend sitting down at regularly scheduled times to think with a journal and planner in hand. There is one caveat here – sometimes we just need to think without forcing ourselves to multitask, which can be a difficult thing to do in a fast-paced world.

This time however is necessary, and it is what I refer to as processing time, helping us to accomplish tasks by first quieting down the frantic energy or anxiety that comes with not being able to anticipate what comes next.

When we sit down with a journal in hand, we can use three different methods of capturing our thoughts. We can create a mind map which helps people who think in pictures or concepts, alternatively those who benefit from structure can create lists. If you are a list keeper, consider checking out “Listful Thinking” by Paula Rizzo – this publication really helped me.

Some of us think in narratives so we may write ourselves a story, or letter, reiterating the thoughts we took time to process back to us, alleviating feelings of panic when it comes time to begin the work.

Any of these three activities, or a combination of them, will help us declutter our minds. Whether our mental clutter stems from having too many things to do, or from that voice in our heads keeping us awake at night with all that we’re worrying about – it can steal our potential for feeling joy in the present moment, especially when we are constantly in stress mode. One of the most frustrating forms clutter can take as well is brain fog, a deluge of thoughts that aren’t really connected, getting in the way of us accomplishing our goals.

When we sit down to process and organize our thoughts, we must allow ourselves freedom from censorship to get through the fog. There is no judgment, you’re welcome to tear the entry up the moment you’re finished with it. The value doesn’t lie in what ends up on the piece of paper, it is in the act and process of writing it down. Typically, this allows for some order to take place.

After we have cleared our mental clutter, we are in a much better position to tackle physical clutter. When the mind is open, it can begin to sort out that which rests outside of it in a meaningful way.

Start by asking yourself a few questions as you sit to think like:

What do I want to accomplish?
What do I need to do accomplish it?
In what way do I need to show up in order to accomplish it?
Why do I want to accomplish it?
Is this the right time to try accomplishing it?

Keep the answers to these questions handy. They will be helpful to us next week when we talk about tackling our physical clutter. We will review where to start, how to get started and how to keep going until we see progress.

Please don’t hesitate to share alternate methods you use to clear your mental clutter, and how you streamline your life while doing it!

Also posted in Coaching, Life Coaching, Time management | Tagged declutter, life, mental clutter, organization, reclaim your freedom, streamline your life, Time management | Leave a comment

Streamline Your Life Using the Principle of Multiplicity

By Tereasa Jones | Published April 6, 2017

One of my clients wrote a document that she calls the “Jones Principles”. These are attitudes that she has learned throughout our coaching over the past several years. One of the Jones Principles is the principle of multiplicity. In other words, if you are going to put the work in, make it so that you will benefit from the it more than once. At the end of this article you will find a handy Jones Principles Checklist that you can download!

This principle really speaks to simplifying and streamlining your life. It can be applied to many facets and I will be talking about more of these in future blogs, but today I just want to introduce you to the concept. One example would be when you are preparing a dish that may be time consuming, why not make two at once and put one in the freezer for later? This same client also mentions that when she shops for her son’s winter clothing, she purchases several pairs of identical gloves so that when he loses a glove, he has a replacement right away. It saves him from having to throw the other out and helps her son salvage gloves during the winter. Furthermore, it’s convenient for her because she doesn’t have to keep making trips to the mall to replenish them during the winter season.

Probably the most helpful streamlining thing I do however is making salad for the whole week. I put the salad in 5-7-quart sized mason jars, and voila! Lunch is done for the week! The ingredients for my salad include romaine lettuce, spinach, carrots, red yellow or orange peppers, apples, strawberries walnuts and feta. Bear in mind that the apples and avocados do turn a little bit brown, but it doesn’t affect the flavor at all. If you want, you could toss them in with a little lemon juice before adding them to the jar to help them retain their color (but I think it changes the flavor).

Another thing I do with food is I make Quinoa cups for breakfast. I make them in 1 cup ramekins with lids and freeze them. When I make these, I make a lot! My oldest daughter loves them so I prepare around three or four dozen at a time. Doing so in advance ensures that healthy breakfasts to start the day are available right at our fingertips!

Remember to download the Jones Principles Checklist below to get started!

Also posted in Coaching, Cognitive Distortions, Decision management, Decision Management, Life Coaching, Procrastination, Time management | Tagged ADHD, freedom, life, planning, reclaim your freedom, Relationships, self-care, streamline your life | Leave a comment

Streamline your Life, Reclaim your Freedom!

By Tereasa Jones | Published March 17, 2017

When you first walk in the door to your home after a hard day at work, how do you feel? Do you sigh with pleasure because you’re finally in your safe spot, or do you just want to run away because your home is a stressful mess? Have you ever wanted to invite friends over, but didn’t because of the state of your place? Have you ever been late because you couldn’t find your keys, your coat, your gloves in the mess? Are you forced to grab food on the run because you didn’t have time to prepare a nutritious meal? Is your clutter and lack of organization stealing your peace? Do you just want some FREEDOM and REST? Sounds like you need to streamline your life!

When I first asked what having a streamlined life meant to my clients, I got back answers ranging from “experiencing peace” to “having time for family, friends, hobbies, and relaxation”. All of that sounds good to me! But the question is, how do we reach that place of peace and freedom?

Join me the next several weeks as we explore how you can move from a stressed out, worn out You to a newly energized, rested, and peaceful You. Over just a few weeks, you can find the freedom you have been looking for and take control of your life. Before we get started, let’s take a look at some of the things that might get in your way. And at the end of this article, there is a mental clutter checklist that you can download to get started!

Creating the right mindset is critical to your success

Today, let’s just talk about what you can do to prepare your mind for the transition into a streamlined life. All the good intentions in the world won’t help if you aren’t mentally and emotionally ready. Behavior follows attitude, actions are behaviors. This means that if your attitude isn’t right, the behavior and actions that follow won’t get you where you want to be. What can you do to give yourself the best chance for success? Here are a few questions that will help you assess where you are on the idea of streamlining your life:

Why do you want to streamline your life?
What benefit will it provide for you?
What will your life look like when it is streamlined?
What does your life look like right now?
Is this the right time to do this? If not, when?
Do you have any concerns about the process? What are they?

Take some time and answer these questions for yourself. The time might be now, or the time might be a month from now. You’ve continued reading this so far, so my guess is that the appeal of streamlined life is on your mind. Well then, let’s go on this journey together! Watch your inbox for my next post and don’t forget to download the mental clutter checklist below:

Also posted in Coaching, Communication, Decision management, Decision Management, Life Coaching | Tagged ADHD, freedom, life, planning, reclaim your freedom, Relationships, self-care, streamline your life | Leave a comment

Staying Focused During the Holidays

By Tereasa Jones | Published December 9, 2016

Are you ready for the holidays? I know I’m not. Each year I promise myself that I will get started earlier next year, but when next year gets here there seem to be all of these things that are pulling my attention elsewhere! I know you know the feeling! But if the holidays are to be what we want, then focus we must!

Planning, prioritizing, and organizing are three skills that are necessary to stay on top of things, yet those are three skills that are controlled by the executive functioning part of our brains. When you have ADHD, executive functioning is the part of your brain that is impaired. So what’s a person to do? Try these things to help yourself survive the rest of the holiday season.

Simplify – keep decorations, baking, cooking, and shopping, at a minimum. We all need to heed this little piece of advice. Look around you and you will notice that things are ramping up and in the next few weeks will start to spin out of control. Try and keep yourself separate from all of that. Decide on a few things that are really important to you and focus on those.
Make lists. My clients tell me this is hard because they already make lists. In fact, they make so many of them that they can’t find the ones they need and it contributes to the paper clutter, which creates more stress. Something that has worked for me for a lot of years now is to keep my lists all in the same notebook. I use steno notebooks because they are different than the usual notebook or sheet of paper which makes them easy to spot when things do pile up. I keep my steno pad next to me as I work. I continually add items to the book. Then from that book, I will transfer say, my grocery list to a sticky note, or notes about family members sizes I will put first in the notebook and then on a smaller piece of paper which goes in my wallet so it will be there as I shop. So why do it twice? If it’s in the notebook it isn’t going to get lost. Even if I lose the list in my wallet, I can always go back to the notebook to get the information. Somethings never leave the notebook, but for convenience in shopping, etc. some things do.
Simplify your shopping by mapping out where you are going which will save you time and stress later. Pick a day and time when the shopping malls and stores will be less likely to be crowded. Do your shopping as early in the season as you can. You will be less likely to purchase impulsively and more likely to avoid crowds.
Practice extreme self-care. If a massage will help you relax those tight muscles, schedule one. Put limits on how many invitations you will accept. Saying no if you are over extended is allowed. Really!!! Keep your expectations aligned with your values. What does this season mean to you? Don’t let all the hoopla steer you away from that. This might be an excellent time to keep that gratitude journal or list. Sometimes just five minutes to list all the things you can think of off the top of your head that you are grateful for can give you a quick attitude adjustment and bring your expectations back into alignment.
What are your family traditions? As families grow and new members join, what brought you joy might now bring you stress. Give yourself permission to reevaluate. This one has been hard for me, but we started out a family of five and now we are now a family of 16 and growing! I’ll let you in on a little secret, the first year of changing traditions is the hardest! After that the new traditions are pretty well accepted.
There are many demands on our time made at this time of the year from our jobs and communities. Everyone is trying their best to make our holidays special, and yet what really happens (if we aren’t careful) is that we are showing up for all the things we feel obligated to attend, and we are not showing up for all the things (and people) that we want to be present for.
Don’t over-spend. It kind of ruins the whole gift giving thing when you go over your budget and into debt. Again, set your expectations, communicate them with your family and friends, and then implement them! Nobody will love you less if you stick to your budget. I promise!

I hope these things will be gentle reminders for you as you go through this season. Mostly I hope that each of you will truly allow yourselves to enjoy this season. Without joy, we just become scrooges!

If you would like some help with your holidays, just let me know. I’d be happy to brainstorm with you to help you keep this time simple and joyful!

Also posted in Time management | Tagged ADHD, holiday, organization, planning, prioritize, self-care, Time management | Leave a comment

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